. . . and wake up to who you really are
Remember the last time the waiter brought your food and it wasn’t exactly what you’d ordered? The conversation in your head might have gone like this:
It’s not that bad.
But it’s not what I ordered.
Don’t make a stink. It’s not like it’s inedible.
I deserve to have what I want.
Everyone will think you’re obsessive. Just eat it.
Whether it’s something small like how your food is prepared or a bigger issue – remaining in a relationship that isn’t what you want or a job that’s not a fit – ego will do its best to keep you swinging between the extremes of settling, which makes you feel like a victim, and the self-righteousness of not settling, which can make you sound like a jerk.
Spirit, on the other hand, reaches for what is like itself. It does so with kindness and grace. No suffering required. So if you want your hash browns extra crispy, reach for that. If you want to be in a relationship or job that supports your dreams, goals and desires, reach for that.
Because ego likes to be in control, chaos may be a part of your process. When things don’t go the way you’d like them to immediately, ego will try to convince you that settling was the better option. Don’t believe it. Trust that reaching for the reflection of who you really are means that you’ll get that, even though it may not look like what you imagined.
So if you catch some grief from your dining partners about sending your food back, stay in the calm center of reaching for the reflection of who you are. Smile. Know the chaos won’t last forever. Nothing does. Don’t settle, reach.
Staci Backauskas is an author and spiritual explorer who’s logged over 10,000 hours on the journey of awakening to the truth of who she really is. She has written seven books, including Ego: A Primer, and her Out Your Ego! column is syndicated both in print and online. Her work inspires others to realize that there is no “answer,” only the next step – and that is enough.